:::alone again
this afternoon i drove lucy and the kids to lax for their trip to chicago. it was my christmas present to lucy: the opportunity to be with her familia not just for christmas, but for thanksgiving also.
retro back to 1999. when lucy moved out here to socal, i made a (sort-of)pact with her and myself, that we would alternate christmases between here and chicagoland. i felt it the only sensible thing to do. after all, i "took her away" from those she loved and cared about.
by sending her today, i uphold that bond.
back to a few weeks ago. i was debating whether to have us go to chicago for the holidays seeing as how i'm in dire need of a new car. but i thought of my covenant and the need for mayra and tony to experience christmas in chicago, a real winter wonderland. (we here in socal get deprived of a "white christmas.") i think of all the navidades that lucy has known, quiet snowflakes descending upon rooftops, that warm scent of tantalizing tamales, and, of course, the wild glee of kids opening their gifts. how could i bear preventing lucy and the kids from this rich tradition?
the only thing that bothered me was when i "gave" her this gift. lucy seemed sad. it seemed she felt i was trying to get rid of her. i thought, here i am, trying to save up for a new car, yet still forfeiting funds i could apply towards it, in order to fulfill a self-imposed agreement- not to mention the fact that i could end up being alone for christmas. (as it is, i still need to go to the bank to deposit a few hundred bucks into her account so she can get by while over there.)
i really wish i could spend the holidays with lucy and the familia in chicago, but i need to focus on my goal of acquiring an automobile. perhaps an angel will grant me this wish.
this afternoon i drove lucy and the kids to lax for their trip to chicago. it was my christmas present to lucy: the opportunity to be with her familia not just for christmas, but for thanksgiving also.
retro back to 1999. when lucy moved out here to socal, i made a (sort-of)pact with her and myself, that we would alternate christmases between here and chicagoland. i felt it the only sensible thing to do. after all, i "took her away" from those she loved and cared about.
by sending her today, i uphold that bond.
back to a few weeks ago. i was debating whether to have us go to chicago for the holidays seeing as how i'm in dire need of a new car. but i thought of my covenant and the need for mayra and tony to experience christmas in chicago, a real winter wonderland. (we here in socal get deprived of a "white christmas.") i think of all the navidades that lucy has known, quiet snowflakes descending upon rooftops, that warm scent of tantalizing tamales, and, of course, the wild glee of kids opening their gifts. how could i bear preventing lucy and the kids from this rich tradition?
the only thing that bothered me was when i "gave" her this gift. lucy seemed sad. it seemed she felt i was trying to get rid of her. i thought, here i am, trying to save up for a new car, yet still forfeiting funds i could apply towards it, in order to fulfill a self-imposed agreement- not to mention the fact that i could end up being alone for christmas. (as it is, i still need to go to the bank to deposit a few hundred bucks into her account so she can get by while over there.)
i really wish i could spend the holidays with lucy and the familia in chicago, but i need to focus on my goal of acquiring an automobile. perhaps an angel will grant me this wish.
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